Mary Stewart Anthony, the flower child, on a bridge

Life on the Edge of Empty

These are thoughts I’ve had on a lifestyle I can understand now, because I once had to live it when I was single.

“Living on the edge of empty” means not being concerned with taking time to be fully prepared and ready. It’s more important to keep on going, no matter how much “go power” you have left. It is enough to have just enough to keep moving, not watching the dial, but just the road ahead, and the goal to reach, pushing past your last known extremity. You stop long enough to replenish, and don’t mind running out, or being on empty. You keep on hoping there will be enough and there usually is.

Becoming “empty” is not a problem, or a worry.  Push the dial below empty as long as you can. You don’t calculate it may cause you to stop. Let everything run out to a zero. It’s not a catastrophe. Tomorrow is another day. No need to be on “full”, or be “full on”, or even feel full. I thought it was  better to be slightly hungry all the time. Nothing wrong with that. Though I must admit I never liked to have an empty fridge, or a bare cupboard, because I grew up in poverty. A different extremity.

I lived this way as a single woman, and also as a single mother. I was often on the verge of collapse because I didn’t know my own limits. Now I have a companion who constrains me as we journey on together. He has helped me to slow down, and think about the next steps. He has probably saved my life, or at least has added years to my life. So, it’s a life process that goes from extremity to moderation. It may not bring a rush of adrenalin but it has brought order from chaos, and peace of mind.
Does that mean I give up spontaneity, a very important part of creativity??? Never! May my necessities ever be the mother of witty inventions.

Does that mean that I’ve stopped flying by the seat of my pants? Yes, a little, and maybe a lottle.
I still like life a little bit edgy, and find that life has its exciting turns, edges and presents us with new vistas. Don’t want it to ever be “cookie cutter predictable”. Oh no. Living by faith never is. There’s adventure enough to make every day exciting, if only we stop to listen, watch, and learn what’s really going on around us.

Here’s to every season that brings us to turning points.


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